Birthday will never be a celebration anymore for me since I took all the shackles and wrapped them all around my hands [meaning when I started to get my own money and let myself be equated with all those bills and expenses.]
Birthday will be more like a day when I get lost, trying to empty my head, my mind. And to this point, being born on new year, surely doesn’t help. My birthday will always be associated with celebration.
Birthday will come in couple weeks and these past weeks have been scandalous weeks for me, between me and myself and some cameos that screaming to my head that I was a lousy human being. Some things are definitely not going the way I think they should be, and it stroke me the fact that I have sold myself. I was born free and now, I am very expensive, but yeah…I’m not free, anymore.
There are people and things that always let me down or bother me and somehow, they came within the space of 2 weeks. And the way, I am, human dealing with it is to minimize the inputs of what I’ve heard, I’ve seen or tasted. A short-term memory lapse to forget and a quasi-forgiving ability. I hate when people pretend things never happened, speak of things in whispers, pass messages in riddles, preach on political correctness and put the mask on.
But well, does the world care? Not really. We do have to go on.
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