Maybe Baby

Since we got married, I've been asked many times about baby. Honestly, the questions don't bother me. I think sometimes people just need to have a conversation and when marriage is the new big thing in my life, maybe having a baby is what people think appropriate to ask about. It's like, so now you've in the marriage level, when are you going for the next one? I don't know. I honestly don't know.

Piwat and I, we have our own considerations about having kids and we shared early on that having children is not on our priority. But it also doesn't mean that we don't want kids. We just don't have the urge or the calling yet. And I don't think it's an anomaly or we are having a baby ambivalence; we're just married for 2 months, hello!

It's just that we want to take things slow and we want to enjoy our life as a newly wed for a while. Piwat and I are still adjusting to referring "husband and wife" to each other and I think we'll work on it for a year or two or many years before we think we are ready to move to the "mother and father" chapter.

To me, having kids is such a major life change. It’s not something that anyone should enter into flippantly. It's a life time commitment that will affect a lot of aspects in our life, from the financial plan, the way of thinking, the body to the relationship itself. And I strongly believe that everyone should be ready or at least feel ready to be parents. It's unfair for the children to be born in a family that is not ready for them. Children mean responsibilities. Of course they bring happiness and many other blessing but they come with elaborative responsibilities. Having children requires a consistent sacrifice and there's no way back.

And at this time, I don't think Piwat and I are mentally ready to have children. We have other priorities that will clash with being parents. Maybe for some people, by people I mean our aunties, the children are the pinnacles of their existences. Maybe for my brother-in-law (a new dad) his uber-darling baby boy (picture below) is the source of his happiness and he's willing to put the boy over everything else. But for Piwat and I, crossing the continents in Trans Siberian or witnessing FIFA World Cup is a must-do before we die. 

So, I don't think of having a baby yet. It's great to have kids if that's what you want and what makes you happy. We are the generation who live with all the free will; we should be able to make our own decision regardless other people's belief. Because it's only us who's responsible for our own happiness and nothing is wrong with chasing our dreams and living the life the way we want it to be.

ps. take a look at the photo at your own risk: an urge to procreate may arise.  

the current favorite family member: Satu Pattalarungkhan